Puffy White Blankets Cause Sex and Babies

While surfing the net I was reminded of something I have always found amusing because it is so ridiculous. Photo editors of (mostly) women's magazines who are trying to represent sex obviously can not show pictures of people having sex. So they figure that a picture of a man and a woman's feet, sticking out from under a puffy white blanket will somehow represent sex. Most of these photos are funny, because as we can tell from leg and foot position that these people can't possibly be having sex unless someones legs are on backwards. Would it be too suggestive to have the legs positioned in a way that would make sex possible? Probably.

As I mentioned before, notice the puffy white blanket. As if articles about sex weren't already ridiculous enough, making us think that a red light bulb in our lamp will suddenly turn our significant others into coordinated love-acrobats, now we also need an expensive down comforter under which to do those things that are being represented by the feet. This is laughable, because as far as I know, no one actually has sex under a blanket. And if they did, wouldn't the blanket be hanging down at the foot of the bed, therefore covering the feet? And wouldn't there be a sheet between the feet and the blanket? Which would most likely be tucked in? There are just so many things wrong with this.

Here are some that are even more confusing. Obviously I am not calling these sex-representing-foot-under-blanket-photos because there are smaller feet along with the larger feet. They were probably used in an article about how to enjoy one of those blissful Sunday mornings where your adorable children hop into the bed and cuddle with you. Or an article about the problem of children who won't sleep in their own beds. But from what I can tell, owning a white puffy blanket will up your chances of reproducing. I also think these are funny, because if all of these peoples feet are aligned at the base of the bed, (above photo. You know, that one with the feet sticking out from under the blanket,) the kids are being smothered under the puffy blanket and probably have their faces smashed against dads hairy gut. Awww.

And if that's not bad enough, this one is. I know when I'm taking care of a newborn, I always place him between my calves and cover him with piles of cloth.

Thanks for reading, and if you're not ready to have kids yet, try getting a thin colorful blanket, and keep your feet safely under it.